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Kicking your porn addiction can help you last longer

Stop jerking to porn and reconnect with your body. It sounds simple, but old porn habits die hard. Here’s a free resource to help with that.

I’ve written previously about the connection between watching porn and experiencing premature ejaculation.

In a nutshell, jerking off to porn doesn’t cause PE. But if we struggle with PE and want to learn how to have sex for longer, a porn habit can inhibit our progress. It’s not the cause of the problem, but gets in the way of fixing it.

Masturbation is an opportunity to tune into our bodies and learn how to balance our sexual arousal with physiological relaxation; that’s key to lasting longer. But if we always masturbate to the many distractions of PornTube, we’re not making that connection.

So a change to your self-pleasure ritual is required. Put your phone down and focus on the sensations and tensions in your lower body.

Disconnecting from porn for a while might be quite an ask, I know. Jerking off this way – using your own touch and imagination – might feel quite different at first. But like most guys, you’ll probably find it easier than you think.

And if you’re over 40, it’s pretty reassuring to find that you can still get hard without the visual stimulation of porn.

Then there are men who find it much more difficult. Porn isn’t just an accompaniment to jerking off; it’s compulsive viewing. Some guys collect and hoard porn. Some turn to porn to escape and distract themselves from other stresses in their lives.

Now we’re all grown-ups here and we can do what we like. But if you find it genuinely difficult to kick the habit, here’s a free resource that can help.

Back in 2007, I was working as a counsellor and ‘porn addiction’ was a bit of a phenomenon. Thanks to broadband and torrents and usenet, we suddenly had anonymous access to unlimited channels of porn. I started having conversations with guys who felt addicted to the stuff.

So I researched the issue and wrote a self-help guide that had some success. I got interviewed on BBC Radio 4 and held workshops for other therapists who wanted to understand more. My book Porn Game Over managed to tackle the issue without being anti-porn or preachy, which was quite refreshing at the time.

PGO book cover

Within a couple of years, the therapy industry caught up and a zillion porn addiction websites, books, courses and specialist services became available. I moved on to other things.

So I offer the full book as a free download for anyone who might benefit. Maybe you are working on your sexual confidence but old habits keep getting in the way. Perhaps you’ve recognised that you spend more time on Xhamster than you really should.

I like to think this book is still relevant and useful. Sure some of the links and recommended resources will be obsolete, but I stick by the advice. The illustrations are cute too.

Porn addict washing his hair

If you’d like a copy, you don’t need to subscribe to an email list or anything like that. Just click this link to download the full PDF from my therapy site.

I hope you find it useful.

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