First up, this popular hack is more of a cautionary tale: a guy’s girlfriend advised him to rub toothpaste on his dick before sex.
She said it was a known home-remedy. He tried it and the stinging sensation certainly gave him something else to think about during sex.
Would I recommend this approach? Absolutely not.
If your girlfriend makes a similar suggestion, or you see discussions online about using toothpaste for this very purpose – it’s nonsense, it’s bollocks. And it’s potentially painful bollocks too.
A quick google reveals this is a thing – people are suggesting toothpaste to help with lasting longer and erection difficulties.
And I can see why the tingling, minty feeling might have a numbing effect. But erections? How does toothpaste get you hard? I have no idea.
Toothpaste actually has chemicals and colourants that you don’t want on your penis. That stinging sensation was the mild burning of sensitive skin. Don’t do it.
If you have any small tears in your skin, you could even get a bacterial infection. And you risk passing this on to your partner too. Don’t do it.
Use toothpaste on your teeth before sex, freshen up your breath – absolutely. And if you want to numb your penile sensitivity a bit, there are safe products for that.
There’s a huge selection of delay sprays and wipes out there. Most of them contain lidocaine, a mild topical anesthetic. These things tend to come in black packaging and have pictures of stallions and raging bulls on them.
Look online, find one with reputable reviews. And anything that says it will numb your penis and make it bigger is more bollocks, so avoid that. There’s no need to spend a fortune either – these are straightforward products.
Cock rings for endurance
Next, quite a few guys use cock rings to help them last longer. They find it helps them to stay hard and keep going during intercourse.
This is definitely safer so why not give it a try? Cock rings are mainstream and a lot of guys use them to enhance their erections.
I think there’s still a tendency to associate cock rings with gay sex, but they are certainly used by straight guys too. And anyone with a penis can struggle with premature ejaculation, regardless of their sexuality of course.
If you wear a cock ring, have it snug but not too tight – it should gently restrict the blood flow out of the penis, helping maintain your hard-on. Like all these things, experiment on your own first. Masturbate with it and find what works for you.
Do cock rings help guys to last longer? The marketing often says so, and I think they can help with feeling more confident, more pumped up. If you’re less worried about losing your erection, you’re going to feel more relaxed and that can only help.
Beyond that, I’m not sure cock rings delay ejaculation in any other way. But that might be all you need. Give it a go, have fun with this.
69 position before penetration
And finally, the top tip. A client of mine discovered that spending time in 69 position before intercourse made a huge difference to his ability to last.
Think about it. One of the keys to lasting longer is acclimatisation: settling into sex and being able to ride those initial waves of pleasure.
Men often find that if they can get past those initial few minutes of feeling on edge, feeling close, they are surprised by how long they last. It’s a natural process, like easing yourself into a hot tub.
So it makes sense to enjoy a good amount of foreplay before intercourse for this reason. Men who worry about coming too soon often avoid foreplay, or at least foreplay that involves their penis.
If you find yourself doing that thing where your turned-on partner reaches for your penis and you flinch and move their hand away, you are missing an opportunity.
And 69 position brings some specific benefits. You and your partner get to receive pleasure while giving pleasure – it’s a balance of sensation and focus.
And for the guy who wants to last longer, going down while receiving stimulation is the right kind of distraction; he’s still connected, he’s in the moment, his focus is on his partner and their responses.
Your partner will enjoy the sensations too, helping them to get closer to orgasm, or have an orgasm, before moving on to penetration. This takes the pressure off everyone.
If you’re not sure about the infamous 69 position – it is a bit misunderstood – here’s a primer by sex therapist Vanessa Marin.
And one more thing on the benefits of 69. The guy who had this revelation found it more effective when he was on top, with his partner lying beneath him. Maybe there’s more freedom to move, maybe gravity is on your side. I don’t know but it seemed to work best. Try it all ways round, including on your sides.
So there we have it – three suggestions of varying quality. But a couple you can definitely run with.
I hope you found this useful, and please feel free to share your hacks for lasting longer – below in the comments if you’re feeling brave or get in touch with me directly.